August 31, 2010


I keep having these dreams. They're stupid annoying dreams that aren't really scary, but still affect my waking life. I wake up feeling... disheartened? I think that's the word. Like I've done something disasterous before I've even gotten out of bed.

There are 2 that seem to alternate back and forth in my poor little head. The first is about school. Sometimes it's University, sometimes it's High School. Every time, I'm doing something, whether it's riding on a bus or a train, or hanging out in a rez room, or lying on the couch... whatever it is, it's not what I'm supposed to be doing. I have an exam to write, but I've never been to the classes or read the book. Or I'm enrolled in a class, but I've never been to it, and I'm going to fail. Or I'm enrolled in 2 classes at the same time, and I haven't turned in any assignments in one and have never been to the other... And I'm never really that panicked, but I'm always wondering what I'm going to tell my parents about why I'm failing.

The other dream I am choosing to blame the Yarn Harlot. I'm still reading through her blogs (I'm at January 2006), and the ones I tend to enjoy the most are the ones where she's panicking a little about a deadline. The ones she panics about the most are her christmas deadlines.

In my dream, it's days before Christmas, and I have no gifts for anyone. I suddenly have a family of thousands, and I have nothing to give anyone, so I start making things up... Taking things from around the house and giving them away, stealing money to get gift cards, things like that. And the thing is, no one ever really notices that I have nothing to give them, but I always know that there's some HUGE concequence to not giving people gifts.

What does it mean? I don't know. I'm not entirely sure that I care. I just wish it would stop so I could get a good night's sleep.

No comments: