March 24, 2007

Are we there yet?

So, I've got 2 more assignments left before Exams. This is a good thing! One of them involves defining family, and the other Learning Objectives for placement (which is basically Goal Setting, and you all know how good I am at that...).

I've been concidering my goals for placement, actually. But, really, they're more personal goals that I should work on Anyways. For Example:

1) Talking. I need to do less of it. Actually, according to Jude James (my interviewing prof), I talk "too damned fast", so slowing down might help. I also need to tweak my social filter a little more. Once I start talking, I don't stop. And the Babbling when I'm Nervous thing is getting worse. People actually ask me how I have the lung capacity to talk as much as I do when I can barely make it up a flight of stairs.

2)Organization. HAH! Those of you who know me well are looking at this going "You need a Guru, a Dumpster, an old priest and a young priest...", But it's true. I need to start organizing my life better. I need a work-space that's a work-space, and not a cafeteria table and stacks of paper on the floor.

And with that, I need to start, or rather, STOP immersing myself in everything as fast as possible. Something happened along the way, and I got this thing in my head (If I had a Nickel...). This thing, to differentiate it from the other things, was the notion that "If I don't do it now, I'll never have the chance." I think I started living a lot older than I am... Sometimes I forget that I'm only 22, and that I can be useful and active until I'm well into my 80's (...yeah, you're best not to comment on that statement...). Somehow, I got it in my head that 40 years is a very short time, and that before I know it, everything will be over with, and I won't be able to do the things I want. Which is rediculous, I know. I mean, it's not like there's a finish line, and it's not like I'm going to expire or something... It's crazy. And I see it, I do. Old habits are just a bitch to break. I still just want to do everything.

So, I figured, why not? Lets throw all of this stuff down, right now. Maybe some day, I'll look back and be able to check off a few:

-I want to volunteer with VCARS, the victim crisis response team through the OPP. You have to be able to commit a full year, so I can't do it in North Bay for another few years.

-I want to upgrade my degree. I know, it's kinda wacky, and it doesn't really mean anything, but I think some day, maybe when I'm older, maybe retired, I'd like to get those last few credits.

-I want to get my BSW. It's just a year program to get it with my SSW.

-I want to someday get a Soc degree. Just a 3 year general. I like the stuff, now that I've been forced to take it. Sometimes I like it more than Psych!

-I want to get a Fund raising/resource management diploma. The one I've looked at is Online, which would be cool.

-I want to go back to BC, and just wander around. Just really sight-see.

-I want to teach. At a college. Maybe just for a couple of years. You know, see if I can handle it.

-I'll graduate with my Non-Violent Crisis Intervention (I think...), and my ASSIST (suicide prevention) certificates, I'd like to get a couple of others. Actually, I'll probably have to, at some point.

-I want to do a Christmas fundraiser. Something like what LIPI did, or another silent auction... Telethons and things like that. I miss doing that stuff.

-I should really learn how to play Poker.

-I kinda want to learn French. Most jobs now are bilingual, and I regret now not following through on that. I'd kinda like to learn Spanish and more Russian and Japanese. Spanish and Japanese would be career related... Russian just for fun.

-I want to go to New York, LA and an island (Dominican, Bermuda, Barbedos, St. Thomas...I'm not really picky). I think everyone does eventually.

-I want to go to another country and see crisis first-hand. I don't think the news reports and the commercials really show what's going on. I want to see the real thing, and be humbled by it.

-I want to work for the Red Cross. I'll eventually volunteer, but I'd kinda like to be an Aid Worker too. I'll have to get my passport, and be bilingual for that... But I'll definatly volunteer.

-I want to have all of my debits paid, and still be able to live relativly well... nothing too posh, but not impovershed.

I don't know... These are just ideas that I have. Things I really want to do. I keep trying to squish them into "RIGHT NOW!!!!!", but it just doesn't work. There are so many things out there that I want to do... Maybe it's just too much, and I'm trying to make space for all the other things that are going to come up that I haven't even thought of yet. I don't know why I think I'm going to run out of time.

Anyways, I'm hoping to have a few people to the house today to make with the studying, which means I need to prep. And make tea. And mix myself a gin and tonic. For some reason, I study better when I'm drunk...

...Oh, don't worry mom, I'll wait till noon... :P

1 comment:

teddy said...

You have a whole lifetime ahead of you to do the things you want.
Its funny how what you want to do will change as you get older. But it is inspiring to see the drive you have to do as much as you can.
You will accomplish alot with your life because you want to, just dont forget to smell the roses along the way.